Happy Birthday Jamie!

Welcome to this world Miss Hadley Alice Miller. That was the day, September 21, 2010, Jamie's birthday. What a special blessing for a mother to receive on her birthday. Our baby girl was born at 12:59, weighed 3 lbs. 13 oz., and was 16 1/2 in. long.
We had what we thought was going to be a "normal" doctor's appointment on September 21st. They did the usual pre-term labor checks and non-stress test. The next item was the biophysical ultrasound that we were receiving weekly due to the gestational age of the pregnancy. Our ultrasound tech, Cheryl, starting performing her checks but wasn't getting what she needed. Dr. Harstad was then called in to take a look at things. He didn’t like what he was seeing and became very concerned about our baby but couldn’t put an exact finger on what was happening. He called Dr. Nash and spoke with her about the situation and they decided that it was best if we go to the hospital.
I began to make the usual phone calls to the family starting with our parents. Big Daddy (Fr. Herrmann) was coming to our house to surprise Jamie for her birthday and eat some Alice Springs Chicken from Outback steakhouse. I had to let him know that he might want to move that time up for their arrival.
So off we went to the hospital, and before we knew it Jamie was being prepped for a C-section, and I was handed my garb to scrub in. Jamie was wheeled back into the operating room and I had to wait while they finished prepping her. All of a sudden a nurse comes around the corner said, “Daddy are you ready?”, and off to the O.R. I went.
At the moment I walked into the room I saw the most precious look on Jamie’s face and could read her eyes that this was the moment we had waited for. It was happening today, her birthday; our child would be born.
During the delivery of our babies the nurses asked if I had a camera, and I told them I had my phone. Of course we had planned on a very different day than what had happened. I stood up as they handed Hadley to the NICU nurses and was able to get a picture of her gracing us into this world, it was a sight I will never forget.
Hadley was born severely anemic, which meant that she was born with 50% of her blood supply. The nurses immediately began giving her fluids and ordered a blood transfusion of unmatched blood until her blood could be matched. In the meantime, while I was with Hadley, Jamie was wheeled into the recovery room. I was able to call our immediate family with the news of the birth of our baby girl and give them all the “important” stats, and to have them begin asking for prayers.
I went with Hadley to the NICU while Jamie was recovering in the recovery room. It gave me an opportunity to meet with her doctors and her nurses, Jill and Sarah. Hadley received the best possible care from the best possible staff that we could have asked for.
Jamie and I were truly blessed on her birthday to have such a precious little girl born into our lives. She was the most precious thing that we could have ever asked for in a daughter. She was perfect, beautiful and most importantly, she was ours. This is a day that I will never forget for the rest of my life.



Love,
Ben and Jamie

The Rollercoaster

Where to even start since our last blog post? As you can imagine the last month has been very trying on Jamie and I. Dealing with the death of our son, Conley, has not been easy and has been downright hard to deal with at points for me. The thought of having a son was something that I had begun to look forward to and had started to picture us doing things together while there girls were out getting their nails done. Although his earthly life was short we know that he is being cared for and watched over by our heavenly father and loved ones who have gone before us. We know that they can offer him more love than we ever could and he is being loved and cherished by each and every one of them.

All of my focus lately has been strictly on Jamie and our little girl, or Little Alice as many like to call her. For those that don’t know Alice will be her middle name because we are not sharing her first name until we welcome her into this world.

So you may wonder why I have entitled my post “The Rollercoaster?” Well, we have had many ups and downs in our last few weeks since our last post. Jamie has been diagnosed with gestational diabetes, they believe her to be anemic, she has high blood pressure and we’ve made one hospital visit on top of that. We are not sure what else to expect by the time Little Alice makes it into this world but nothing could surprise us at this point. How are we holding up? Probably better than most would expect, the gestational diabetes we are treating through diet. Out with the stuff we LIKE to eat and in with the stuff we HAVE to eat. I just hope it helps with all the sympathy weight I promised I wouldn’t put on!

The anemic condition is very new to us just being diagnosed last week, we are eating a lot of leafy vegetables like spinach and trying to avoid a supplement as they are hard on the stomach. The hospital visit was precautionary as she had a few pre-term labor symptoms, but all checked out ok and we were out of there in a few hours. Fortunately, we were able to get an early look at the labor and delivery rooms, not by choice, but better to be safe than sorry with our situation.

As far as my duties go, they picked up tremendously lately as the doctors have been really restrictive on Jamie. I’ve been cleaning more than I ever have in our marriage, don’t get me wrong I had “my duties”, but this whole house cleaning is a new thing. I appreciate all that Jamie has done around the house allowing me to do the minimal things she doesn’t like doing, floors and trash. I’ve also been doing the shopping at the grocery store and making sure our meals are well balanced and on time. These things have all become important in order to ensure a safe and healthy baby girl. She still lets me get away on Saturday’s for a little coed soccer with my team, which allows me to relieve the stress from the week. It always comes with one stipulation on the way out the door, DON’T GET HURT, which as you know has happened once or twice in my playing career.

We are starting to notice a pattern with our little girl and that is that she doesn’t like to be disturbed in the mornings with monitors and probes. More times than not she tends to kick the monitor or probe, which allowed us to get sonogram pictures like the one in this post.

Thanks to all that have sent cards and extended their kind words through emails or phone calls. These mean a lot to us and it’s great to have a support system like that during this time. We look forward to introducing Little Alice to each and every one of you.


Love,
Ben

Held

“This is what it means to be held. How it feels, when the sacred is torn from your life and you survive. This is what it is to be loved and to know, that the promise was when everything fell we'd be held.” Natalie Grant – Held

On July 6th, we had our regular monthly doctor’s appointment with our OBGYN & our bi-weekly appointment with the Perinatal Group for growth and development for the twins. We first saw Dr. Nash (OBGYN) and everything seemed to be going well. She did a quick sonogram to check on the babies heartbeats and then checked them again with the Doppler machine. She stated that she didn’t see a heartbeat for Baby A (Boy), but not to worry she was going to double check again and her equipment isn’t as good as the perinatal groups. She still didn’t see a heartbeat and stated that she was going to call the perinatal group and get our appointment moved up to check everything out. We arrived at the perinatal group and they whisked us away to one of the many high tech ultrasound rooms. The technician came and started the ultrasound. She checked over Baby B (Girl) and she looked great and then she checked Baby A (Boy). She said, “I don’t see a heartbeat for this baby.” Jamie immediately asked if the doctor comes in to verify that this is in fact the case and Ben started to cry. She stated that he did and proceeded to squeeze Jamie’s arm and hand Ben a box of tissues. Then, what seemed like hours, Dr. Harstad came in to take a look. He was very methodical and scanned over and over and over again. He said, “I am so sorry, but unfortunately, I don’t see a heartbeat for this baby anymore.”

Dr. Harstad then proceed to inform us that he didn’t see any reason on the ultrasound that would have caused the death of the baby. That everything looked as good as it did weeks prior when we had the growth and development ultrasound. He stated that we would have to carry the baby until delivery and that since they were dizygotic twins, that Baby B (Girl) should be fine and not affected. We asked several questions that came to mind right away. The doctor then said he wanted to see us next week to check everything over again and excused himself from the room. The technician then told us to take as much time as we needed and then she looked Jamie right in the eyes and said, “It is nothing that you did. You didn’t do anything wrong to cause this.” She then left us alone in the room. We were devastated. How could a baby so perfect weeks prior have no heartbeat? Why is this happening to us? We have tried for a family for so long and we were blessed with the perfect combination of a boy and girl. God, we don’t understand!

We got ourselves together as best we could and left to head home. After arriving at home, we gathered ourselves as best as we could and called our family. The shock and sadness in their voices was awful. They were the hardest calls that we have ever had to make. Jamie’s parents came and spent a couple of nights with us and Ben’s parents were with us in spirit and in touch by phone.

Since we were withholding the names until their birth, we hadn’t shared them with anyone. We were asked his name so that people could pray for him by name. The name that we chose for our son was Conley Andrew Miller. We are still withholding our baby girl’s name until the day of delivery. But, we will give you this much, _ _ _ _ _ _ Alice Miller.

We are grieving the loss of our son, but we are joyful that God has still blessed us with a second child. We know that the day of their birth will be a difficult one, but we know that we are surrounded in love and prayers by our family, church family and friends. The next weeks are critical for our baby girl. We are currently at 23 weeks and the doctor wants us to reach 32 weeks. Please pray for protection over our sweet girl and for God’s continual peace for our families.

Conley, Mommy and Daddy love you very much and can’t wait to hold you in our arms. For now, may you be held by our Lord Jesus Christ.

Thank you for the outpouring of love, support and prayers that you have shown us. Thank you for holding us up at this time.

So loved,
Jamie & Ben

Baby A and Baby B reveal themselves!

On June 7th, we had our monthly visit with our regular OB/GYN. Since we are having twins, they do an ultrasound every time we go in. This way they can see the heartbeats and that both babies are fine. We were 18 weeks along and we asked if she could tell the gender and if she could, would she write it down in a greeting card that we had brought. This way Ben and I could share this moment alone and not with the doctor. She came to the conclusion pretty quickly about Baby A and couldn't seem to get Baby B to cooperate. Imagine a sideways T with the top of the T pointing left. Baby A was lying horizontal and Baby B was lying vertical. Baby B was hiding under my ribs. The doctor tried to get the baby to move, but it was not having anything to do with it! So, Dr. Nash filled out the card for Baby A only and Ben and I opened it as soon as we got to the car. We were supposed to wait for a special dinner, but since we only knew one baby..I couldn't wait! Baby A is a BOY!
Today, June 15th, we had an appointment with the Texas Perinatal Group. This physician group specializes in multiple births and high risk pregnancies. Dr. Nash referred us to them to do a full work up on the babies. They checked for birth defects, organ placement, bone structure and facial deformities. The babies looked great! There were 20 fingers and 20 toes present! Two beautiful profiles with two beating hearts. The doctor said our babies looked healthy and right on track! Thank you, Lord! The doctor also confirmed that Baby A was indeed a boy and that Baby B was a.........GIRL!
We feel so blessed to be having a boy and a girl! God is so good! We have waited so long for a baby to join our family and now we are adding two! But it doesn't stop there, a boy and a girl!

We head back to see Dr. Nash (OB/GYN) on July 6th and we are back to the perinatal group the same day for a pre-term labor consult. We will keep you posted! Here are a couple of pics from today's ultrasound.

Baby A - Boy











Baby B - Girl













So Loved,
Jamie & Ben

The last month or so..................

Where to start....

I really thought I would be much at blogging than I have been! Where has the last month gone! We have been up to so much!

First off, we headed back to Quincy for Tim's graduation from Quincy University. It was quite the adventure! I was still suffering with morning sickness and the plane rides were not so much fun! But, we made it and had a wonderful trip. We had our first baby shower in Quincy and it was thrown by our close friends, Jessica Dedert & Rachel Baird. It was beautiful! The theme was "Tea for Two" and the decorations and food were out of this world! It was so wonderful getting to see everyone and Ben & I felt so blessed with the gifts that we received. Thank you again! On the way home, Ben and I packed all of the shower gifts into two extra suitcases that we had brought along. Wouldn't you know that one of these two suitcases filled with baby gifts got lost! It puzzles me that you drop off four suitcases and only three arrive at your final destination! But, the next day we received a call that our luggage was found and would be delivered to us!

Ben has been a busy bee getting the nursery furniture painted and ready for the babies! He has repainted both cribs, chest of drawers & dresser. After getting all of this painted, he broke his thumb and bruised his ribs playing soccer. I guess he was trying to tell me that he needed a break! All is well now and he is back to getting the house and the rest of the nursery furniture ready for the twins arrival.

I have still been battling morning sickness and have had to even miss work at times. The doctor continues to tell me that it means the babies are healthy and they are getting what they need. I wish they could do all of this without me losing my breakfast, lunch, dinner and sometimes more. I have been told that this to shall pass and that it should be ending by week 22. Please Lord, let this be true!

Love in Him,
Jamie

The End of 1 and the Start of 2!

It's been a while since I've updated the blog with a post of my own, but since that time we have reached a significant milestone into "our" pregnancy. You might be asking why I say "our" pregnancy? Well, I may not be the one dealing with nausea, morning sickness or the daily aches and pains, but I'm working hard to get our house ready for our two little ones. The cribs have now been touched up with a little white paint due to some minor wear from the previous owners.

The baby furniture has been emptied of adult clothes, the black paint stripped off, and two fresh coats of white paint applied. They are now ready for baby clothes. Along with these projects, the nursery is now painted with two fresh coats of paint.....I've been working hard I tell ya!

The first trimester has been a learning experience for both of us. Is her body going to like what I cooked for dinner or will I be holding her hair back after eating it? I have loved this experience and have really tried to step it up as a husband for her while she is carrying our TWO children. I can't tell you how fun it has been watching the progression of the pregnancy!

I've also taken on reading books and not only ones related to work, but I have enjoyed two pregnancy books that I would recommend to any husband who's wife is expecting. The first book is "The Expectant Father: Facts, Tips and Advice for Dads-to-Be" by Armin A. Brott. It's great for the expectant father like myself. I don't want to give it away in this blog but it has some very good advice for the dad-to-be.

The second book I read was "Twinspiration: Real-Life Advice From Pregnancy Through the First Year (for Parents of Twins and Multiples)" by Cheryl Lage. It is a great book for those couples who are expecting twins like we are. It gives a lot of good advice on the pregnancy and birth of twins, even a few months past that as well. Again don't want to spoil this book for you either but it is a definite read if you are expecting twins.

A book I have yet to get my hands on because Jamie is reading it is "When You're Expecting Twins, Triplets, or Quads, Revised Edition: Proven Guidelines for a Healthy Multiple Pregnancy" by Barbara Luke and Tamara Eberlein. It was lent to us by Debbie Crane, who's daughter had a set of twins, who said that the book was invaluable to them and I know that Jamie has been soaking in the knowledge from this book.

Well enough about the books now, I will update as I read more of them. We have our next appointment with Dr. Nash, OBGYN, in less than a week and I can't wait to see how they have progressed. Of course I have to say "they" because we still don't know the sex of the babies!

I hope this post finds all who read it doing well and we will have another post ready after the doctor appointment.

Love in Christ,

Ben

Life Savers

Well, the last couple of days have been a little rough. Since Friday evening, the “morning” sickness has showed its ugly face. I guess I should be thankful that it has taken 10 weeks to kick in, but I was really hoping that I could just bypass this whole phase. I do want to give a shout out to my amazing husband for being extremely helpful and supportive while I have been feeling these side effects! Ben, you are amazing and I love you so much! Thanks for all you have done and continue to do to help out during this process. There have been two other life savers that I feel I need to mention! The first being Preggie Pops™, these things are amazing! There really isn’t anything in them, but they ease the nausea. Preggie Pops™ are just suckers that come in seven different flavors. They are a God send! The second helper has been “sticky” ginger ale! I have never been a huge fan of ginger ale, but it helps! If you are wondering about the “sticky” part, well…you are going to have to ask my mom, Ginger, about that one! I pray that this “morning” sickness, which is actually hitting me around 5 pm, goes away soon! The babies must be growing up a storm!

~ Jamie

Blessing Multiplied..................

God touched our hearts so deep inside, our special blessing multiplied. ~Author Unknown

Well, we had our second sonogram today and....IT'S STILL TWINS!!!!

Yes, you read it correctly! Twins! God is so good! He has blessed us times two! We are so thankful and give all the praise, thanksgiving & glory to our Father in heaven! We have enclosed some stats to share with you of Baby A & Baby B.

Stats:

Baby A: 25.3 mm long / 9 weeks & 2 days old / heart rate was 172 bpm

Baby B: 23 mm long / 9 weeks old / heart rate was 183 bpm

Here is what baby.com says about week 9:

Your new resident is nearly an inch long — about the size of a prune — and weighs just a fraction of an ounce. She's starting to look more and more human. Her essential body parts are accounted for, though they'll go through plenty of fine-tuning in the coming months. Other changes abound: Your baby's heart finishes dividing into four chambers, and the valves start to form — as do her tiny teeth. The embryonic "tail" is completely gone. Your baby's organs, muscles, and nerves are kicking into gear. The external sex organs are there but won't be distinguishable as male or female for another few weeks. Her eyes are fully formed, but her eyelids are fused shut and won't open until 27 weeks. She has tiny earlobes, and her mouth, nose, and nostrils are more distinct. The placenta is developed enough now to take over most of the critical job of producing hormones. Now that your baby's basic physiology is in place, she's poised for rapid weight gain.

Thank you for your continual support and prayers! We love you all!

So loved,
Jamie & Ben

How does being a Daddy for the rest of your life sound?

Yup! That was the question Jamie asked me when I rounded the corner in our living room. After almost passing out and shedding ample amount of tears, we are now expecting our first child! We are very early in the process so please don’t stop praying for a healthy pregnancy.

Jamie and I have been “patiently” waiting for this day for over 6 years and have been through a lot in getting to this point. All of the questions of “why” that we have continually asked each time things didn’t go the way we planned have been put to rest. The 1st day of March 2010 will be a day of great memories for Jamie and I and it will going into the rolodex of dates from my previous blog post.

I first want to thank our Lord and Savior for never leaving our side and giving us the strength and the faith to continue and believe that this would happen. I want to personally thank my wife of 7 ½ years for accepting me as her husband that 12th day of October 2002 and for the opportunity that we now share together.

I also want to thank our parents for their support and love that they have shown us, as many things in our lives couldn’t have been completed without them. Our brothers and sisters, Meredith and John, Chris and Melissa, and Tim…….we love you all very much and are ecstatic to make you Aunts and Uncles.

This just the beginning of our journey through this pregnancy process and we are very excited, but it’s early and these are the most critical months of the pregnancy. We ask for your continual prayers for a healthy pregnancy for Jamie and our baby.

I was reading through some different bible verses the other day about children, and came across Psalm 127:3-5, which really hit home and it is also in the prayer that Jamie has been praying that is in a previous post.

"Behold, children are a heritage from the Lord. The fruit of the womb is His reward. Like arrows in the hand of a warrior, so are the children of one's youth. Happy is the man who has his quiver full of them: They shall not be ashamed, but shall speak with their enemies in the gate."

This verse really got me thinking about what Jamie and I have been through and that all things are possible through Him. This child is a blessing from God upon our marriage and we are blessed with this most precious gift.

One of my fondest memories is when my Dad came to see me at school when my brothers were born. I can still remember those times of him telling me that I was a brother and how excited I was. Granted, I was 4 and 8 when this happened but it is a great memory. Now, I’m the one who will get to tell my father and the other family members when our child is born.

Love in Christ,
Ben

Happy Valentine's Day

Well.....it's been a while since we posted anything! So, on February 13th my mom and dad came down for a visit. Dad and Ben headed to a UT basketball game and mom and I headed to see Dr. Vaughn at TFC. My mom was super excited to meet Dr. Vaughn and see what all goes on during each visit. Well, Dr. Vaughn came in and he and mom hit it off and are new friends. Dr. Vaughn shows mom everything and explained it all to her. It was wonderful! Mom told Dr. Vaughn that he was going to make her a Grandma and he replied with, “I am trying!”

At the end of the visit, Dr. Vaughn said that tomorrow is going to be the big day, which means that Ben and I are to come back for an IUI. IUI stands for intrauterine insemination. Basically, a turkey baster effect. Enough said, right?

Ben and I headed in to have the IUI done on Sunday, Valentine’s Day and again on Monday, February 15th. Now we wait for two whole, long and excruciating weeks. This time around we didn't tell as many people what we were doing. We believed that this was the time that is was going to work and that we were going to have an announcement!

Stay tuned............

Many prayers,
Jamie

My Turn to Post....

Well Jamie has been wanting me to post something on our blog for quite sometime now and on a chilly day in Austin, TX I decided that 2/10 was that day.

I want to start off saying that I have had the privilege to be married to this beautiful, kind and loving woman for over 7 years now. We have been through a lot together and our marriage has grown over the course of these 7+ years. Some of you may see silly posts on our Facebook pages, like Happy Dating Anniversary or if you have talked to us you may have heard many silly facts about or dating/marriage.


Here are a few:
- Dating Anniversary: January 27, 1999
- First Kiss: March 13, 1999 (Don't ask!!!)
- Engagement: August 2, 2001
- Married: October 12, 2002

These days are not important to some but to us they are because we get to constantly remind ourselves how and where we started our lives together. At one point we were such great friends that I didn't see anything happening past that, although she did for quite some time yet never spoke up.

These last few months have been an exciting and trying time for us and as many of you know that Jamie and I have been trying to have children for quite sometime. We have been seeing a specialist here in ATX who is great, and are now on our 2nd round of the HSG cycle, not much to do on my part right now except try to be a good and understanding husband. I pray for strength for Jamie and I during this process because we know that all things happen in God's time and he has the master plan for us.

Isaiah 41:10
Fear not, for I am with you; be not dismayed, for I am your God; I will strengthen you, I will help you, I will uphold you with my righteous right hand.

My prayers go out to all families who are in the same situation as us and want to grow their family. I ask you Lord that you give them strength to continue believing that all things happen on your time!

Love in Christ,
~Ben

The Go Ahead

Well, today I was given the go ahead to start another HSG injectable cycle. This will be cycle number 2 that we have tried this approach. So today consisted of an ultra-sound to verify that I am cyst free and able to start these shots. For those who don't know, I have to give the shots to myself in my stomach every night around the same time. "Give yourself a shot?" Some might ask, but really, it doesn't hurt and it is something that I am use to now. The doctor decided to start the dosage at the same amount where I stopped on my last cycle. So, Ben......watch out buddy!  The doctor is hoping that is will be a shorter cycle than in November. I am hoping and praying that he is right! So my prayer is:

"Thank you Lord that there is no distance in the Spirit, that your Word says that children are a heritage of the Lord and happy is the man that has his quiver full.?

Father, I pray that you would open my Womb and heal me of any & all infirmity that has caused this infertility. I speak to this barren womb now, and say be full, and fruitful and alive. May it bring forth blessed children of the Lord, in Jesus Name! Amen."

To God be the Glory,
Jamie

New Do......and other thoughts

Well, after three years....I changed my hair! Yes, I did! It was pretty scary. I tried someone new who came highly recommended by my cousin Joni. And, I loved her! She was awesome!

So lately, I feel like God is putting all of these people in my life who need reminding of God's Holy Scriptures. A friend/co-worker who is having triplets, a co-worker that I see every day and several Facebook friends. I have to admit that I do read the Bible, but not nearly as much as I should or am I one whom has ever been one to quote scripture when needed. Of course, we all have are standards that we have memorized, but to really recite scriptures? I am taking this challenge and sign that I, we all need to read more about God's holy word.

On Saturday, Ben and I went to the "Book of Eli" starring Denzel Washington. Wow! What a mission he completed and with all of the challenges that he faced! He memorized the entire Bible. He was able to quote scriptures and in fact recite every word, miracle and event that was written in this scared book.

Have you dived into His word lately?

To God be the Glory,
Jamie

Happy New Year!

"Another fresh new year is here . . .
Another year to live!
To banish worry, doubt, and fear,
To love and laugh and give!

This bright new year is given me
To live each day with zest . . .
To daily grow and try to be
My highest and my best!

I have the opportunity
Once more to right some wrongs,
To pray for peace, to plant a tree,
And sing more joyful songs!”

~ William Arthur Ward

Well, another year is here for the Miller Family! Our prayer for this year is for another year of good health, happiness and blessings. God has blessed us so much in 2009 and we know that He has great plans for us in 2010! We have so much already planned for this year and so much to look forward to!

Ben and I will be diving in head first again this month into fertility treatments. Please keep us in your prayers this year as we forge head in expanding our family.

~ Jamie